A Lame-Assed Excuse

Hi. Thanks for stopping by. Glad you're here. Too bad it's all for nothing, if you were expecting to see a new post for this date. It was my intention to have a new one ready, and call it "Three-Way on the Freeway." It was going to be dedicated to my friend Johnny Wraith. But that post isn't ready, so all I have to offer is this lame-assed excuse. I know that I really didn't have to put anything up, and you would have never known the difference. The problem is, I would have known. And Johnny would have known.

Yeah, like some writers are wont to do, I discussed the debut of a story before it was ready for publication. This is always a mistake. As a matter of fact, I was talking to Johnny just a few hours ago, and told him that he could look forward to reading it bright and early in the morning. Early being the operant word: Johnny typically gets up at about five a.m. each day. I knew he would log on to read it well before dawn, seeing as how it was dedicated to him, and involved one of his favorite topics. Probably the one at the top of his list. Sex. Involving humans, not lab rats. Though Johnny apparently likes to watch lab rats go at it. Whatever. Different strokes, and all of that. But my story is one involving humans, not lab rats, so I knew he was looking forward to it.

But as I wrote the story, it started growing. Exponentially. By leaps and bounds. It started to scare me, it was getting so big. As a matter of fact, even though it was no more than two-thirds finished, it became obvious that I would have to pare it down. A lot. Which isn't a bad thing. As it turns out, all the parts that I have to cut out will become gist for another story. So it wasn't all wasted effort.

So really, this story isn't for you. Most of you will never see it, because the post that should be here will arrive before you do. But I know that Johnny will read this. Which is why I offer this lame-assed excuse. So here goes...

Johnny: hey man, I'm sorry. I'll finish the story as soon as I can. Please be patient. It'll be worth the wait. Guaranteed.

Hang in there, Tiger. Sorry for making you wait. Meanwhile, stop touching yourself.

Sincerely,

The Cab Guy